Recently I had a day off from the j-o-b and decided to take advantage of it.
So after I dropped my daughter off at school, I thought “I’m gonna treat myself to a quick breakfast.”
Sure, I had a list of things I needed to do and really didn’t want to go too far from home; but hey…time to grab my favorite meal of the day out somewhere is rare.
My go to is Panera (close to home, good food, clean) but nah. I can grab Panera on the move anytime. And some good, crunchy bacon was on my mind.
So I opted for a spot that I had avoided for years (since seeing them listed on quite a few “10 dirtiest restaurants in the U.S.” lists – but I probably should have known that already)…Waffle House.
I blame Big Boi. That morning I had watched his Tiny Desk concert, and the sweatshirts they were rocking got me:
So I ended up sitting in the WH parking lot, questioning my own choice so much that I texted my wife this:
“Noooooooo. Don’t do it!!!!!!”
But it was too late. I had already walked in the door. And y’all know I’m on my “can’t quit” ish for 2019, so I committed.
Even after multiple texts from the wife advising me to “abort” and “walk out” and the five minutes or so I sat there without anyone stopping by to take my order, my resolve was strong.
Yes I thought about getting up, but the smell of bacon was calling me. So I rode it out…like a need bacon solllldier, I thought I told ya.
The server finally stopped by, so I went ahead and placed my order (bacon, eggs, and hash browns) and waited.
A few minutes later, the server brought my plate over.
Ate some bacon. It was good. Crunchy just like I like it. “This might not be so bad” I thought as I ate a little more bacon.
Then I dove into the eggs.
One fork full in and eh…they are ok.
Went back for fork full number two and bam…somebody’s hair was smack dead in the middle of my eggs.
*insert expletive here*
I mean…it happens. Hair from the staff will sometimes fall in food. That could happen anywhere, anytime.
This wasn’t the hair of ANYBODY behind the counter!!!!!!
Not nayer person working in this establishment had hair like that.
Bruh. Whose hair is this and whyyyyy is it all the way down in the middle of the daggone eggs?!?!?!?
I showed my server the issue. She apologized, took my plate, and brought me newly made everything…on the house. And she hit me with 2 free meal cards to use in the future.
But at that point, I just couldn’t bring myself to eat it. Well…except the bacon.
Needless to say, wifey’s “I told you so” shots were ringing out after I updated her on what had transpired. And rightfully so. Plus I knew better.
I left a tip and left the building.
2 minutes later and still hungry, I ended up going back to old faithful:
Some things should be left in the past.
I’ll keep all my good 4am, blurry memories of Waffle House in my rearview and keep it pushing; but I seriously doubt that I’m ever going back.
So if you read this and see me in these skreets anytime soon, ask about the free meal cards.
I will gladly pass them along.